This might take a while. So sit back, relax, grab a cup a tea/coffee/juice and turn on some tunes if you feel like reading the whole thing..
A lot of people say that kids (well, technically adolescents) can't fall in love. Well, whoever said that is a dumbass, because it's true. We can love. We do love.
I fell in love with an amazing guy. His name was Charles and he had the most marvelous personality. He was adorable, funny, smart, understanding (for the most part)..whenever I needed someone to talk to, he would be the one I went to (of course la bcos he was my Fiance). I could talk to him for hours and hours about anything, and he would know exactly what to say. I could tell him things that I couldn’t even tell my best friends. This is big, because I have trust issues. That’s a big part of me. It’s not a good part, but its hard for someone to break through those walls. I could cry in front of him without feeling exposed or vulnerable. I also did things with him that I would have never done with anyone before. Everyone always said that we looked cute together and that they could see us staying together for a long time. We were together for 9 years. That was the greatest year of my life. A lot of my friends said that I was happier than usual, and I was. He made me so content..cheerful..exultant. What we had could be simply described as amazing.
There was a problem though (of course there were..). False rumors started spreading around about me. And the weird part is that he believes those rumors without even find out the truth or even ask me in person. That's really hurt..and he never stand up for me. But, when other people said something bad about me to Him, he would just blow it off. This whole thing happened almost a month before he broke up with me.
Through all the “I love you”’s, the “I miss you”’s… the tears, the laughter. Everything. Even through all of that, he broke up with me even i told him the truth. I never thought it would’ve ended that way. I never wanted it to end that way. He said “Oh, we can be best friends, blah, blah, blah” but I didn’t just want to be friends. I wanted to be his girl (and I still do). Our “friendship” went on for a while. We talked casually, but never like we did when we were together.
I hated not being with him and just being friends with him. I loved him more than I have ever loved anyone in my life (which is the complete truth). When I asked him if he loved me… I asked for the truth. He said he do but not as how he loved me before. I didn’t bug him about it for a while, but he would always bring up things about when we were together. And when I told him that I loved him, he would ask me not to say it. So I stopped altogether, because he said that he wanted to take a “break” from talking to me..
A few days later, I told him that I couldn’t stop thinking about him. Everything reminded me of what once was, and I couldn’t take it. I told him that all I want is the complete and honest truth of whether or not he loved me, and if that was a no, I wouldn’t bug him anymore. We would never have to talk to each other again. I felt like it was a game with him not telling me whether or not he really loved me, and that I was sick of the game. His exact text message (yeah, he fricken text messaged me) was. “No. I do not love you. Please do not love me because I absolutely do not feeling the same. I just don’t. I never will.”
That’s the last thing he said to me. All I could think was that through all the things we’ve been through together, how can he not feel the same way? I never thought that rumors would ruin our relationship. He always said how much he loved me, and that what we had was so special. Now we don’t even talk (well, only at times). He doesn’t even want to talk to me. I feel like my heart was torn out of my chest, ripped up into a thousand little pieces, thrown to the ground, and stomped on numerous times by the one I love so much who doesn’t love me back. It’s the worst feeling in the world. It really is.
Its been 6 months since we said our last goodbye’s, but I still feel as if I love him. I do. I love him with all of my heart. I know for a fact that I do, because after all the horrible things he said to me, I still feel something for him. I wish that I could just kiss him once more and be in his arms. And I want nothing more just to talk to him and have him comfort me, but I know I can’t. I‘ll feel like I‘m just trying to get his pity.. We shared so many things together, and I just want that back. My friends know that I’m hurt. They can tell that there’s another sudden change in me, but this time, that change took a turn for the worst. I try to put on a happy face, but I know that everyone can see through it.
So, that’s my story about my heartbreak...sigh~
Dear Heart-Breaker,
Everyone says to give up on you,
But they don't see you like I do...
You are the one who broke my heart.
You're the reason my world fell apart.
You are the one who made me cry,
Yet I still love you, and I don't know why.
I will give you a kiss, and give you the world.
I'll give you my heart... I'll be your girl.
I will give you my smile, and give you my time.
Just give me your love, and I'll make you mine.
I have loved you since this whole thing started.
Sincerely. Yours Truly. With Love
Never take your own revenge, beloved, but leave room for the wrath of God, for it is written, "Vengeance is mine, I will repay," says the Lord.
Romans 12:19
A lot of people say that kids (well, technically adolescents) can't fall in love. Well, whoever said that is a dumbass, because it's true. We can love. We do love.
I fell in love with an amazing guy. His name was Charles and he had the most marvelous personality. He was adorable, funny, smart, understanding (for the most part)..whenever I needed someone to talk to, he would be the one I went to (of course la bcos he was my Fiance). I could talk to him for hours and hours about anything, and he would know exactly what to say. I could tell him things that I couldn’t even tell my best friends. This is big, because I have trust issues. That’s a big part of me. It’s not a good part, but its hard for someone to break through those walls. I could cry in front of him without feeling exposed or vulnerable. I also did things with him that I would have never done with anyone before. Everyone always said that we looked cute together and that they could see us staying together for a long time. We were together for 9 years. That was the greatest year of my life. A lot of my friends said that I was happier than usual, and I was. He made me so content..cheerful..exultant. What we had could be simply described as amazing.
There was a problem though (of course there were..). False rumors started spreading around about me. And the weird part is that he believes those rumors without even find out the truth or even ask me in person. That's really hurt..and he never stand up for me. But, when other people said something bad about me to Him, he would just blow it off. This whole thing happened almost a month before he broke up with me.
Through all the “I love you”’s, the “I miss you”’s… the tears, the laughter. Everything. Even through all of that, he broke up with me even i told him the truth. I never thought it would’ve ended that way. I never wanted it to end that way. He said “Oh, we can be best friends, blah, blah, blah” but I didn’t just want to be friends. I wanted to be his girl (and I still do). Our “friendship” went on for a while. We talked casually, but never like we did when we were together.
I hated not being with him and just being friends with him. I loved him more than I have ever loved anyone in my life (which is the complete truth). When I asked him if he loved me… I asked for the truth. He said he do but not as how he loved me before. I didn’t bug him about it for a while, but he would always bring up things about when we were together. And when I told him that I loved him, he would ask me not to say it. So I stopped altogether, because he said that he wanted to take a “break” from talking to me..
A few days later, I told him that I couldn’t stop thinking about him. Everything reminded me of what once was, and I couldn’t take it. I told him that all I want is the complete and honest truth of whether or not he loved me, and if that was a no, I wouldn’t bug him anymore. We would never have to talk to each other again. I felt like it was a game with him not telling me whether or not he really loved me, and that I was sick of the game. His exact text message (yeah, he fricken text messaged me) was. “No. I do not love you. Please do not love me because I absolutely do not feeling the same. I just don’t. I never will.”
That’s the last thing he said to me. All I could think was that through all the things we’ve been through together, how can he not feel the same way? I never thought that rumors would ruin our relationship. He always said how much he loved me, and that what we had was so special. Now we don’t even talk (well, only at times). He doesn’t even want to talk to me. I feel like my heart was torn out of my chest, ripped up into a thousand little pieces, thrown to the ground, and stomped on numerous times by the one I love so much who doesn’t love me back. It’s the worst feeling in the world. It really is.
Its been 6 months since we said our last goodbye’s, but I still feel as if I love him. I do. I love him with all of my heart. I know for a fact that I do, because after all the horrible things he said to me, I still feel something for him. I wish that I could just kiss him once more and be in his arms. And I want nothing more just to talk to him and have him comfort me, but I know I can’t. I‘ll feel like I‘m just trying to get his pity.. We shared so many things together, and I just want that back. My friends know that I’m hurt. They can tell that there’s another sudden change in me, but this time, that change took a turn for the worst. I try to put on a happy face, but I know that everyone can see through it.
So, that’s my story about my heartbreak...sigh~
Dear Heart-Breaker,
Everyone says to give up on you,
But they don't see you like I do...
You are the one who broke my heart.
You're the reason my world fell apart.
You are the one who made me cry,
Yet I still love you, and I don't know why.
I will give you a kiss, and give you the world.
I'll give you my heart... I'll be your girl.
I will give you my smile, and give you my time.
Just give me your love, and I'll make you mine.
I have loved you since this whole thing started.
Sincerely. Yours Truly. With Love
Never take your own revenge, beloved, but leave room for the wrath of God, for it is written, "Vengeance is mine, I will repay," says the Lord.
Romans 12:19
