!@#$%^&*

As usual i always online at night and he usually online too but never buzz or message me. It's not like i want him or expect him to do that. After a while i get used to it already and i don't even give a damn at all whether he's online or not....but this past few days, he keeps on messaging me just when i just sign in my YM (Yahoo Messenger) and started telling me he misses me and all that. I got confuse...i mean he got a gf, so why the hell bother's me again after i tried so hard to let him go.

He keeps on asking me to meet up and hangout. When i asked him what happen to his gf, he sarcastically answered "i told you it's not easy to be my gf"...it means that he never have a gf after me...and that's BULLSHIT la. Remembering his stupid PTI gf called me and threatened me not to disturb him (which i never did) and that stupid BITCH whom i thinks envy me so much 'till desperately tell d whole world i'm married and have kids - that all keep playing in my mind that he's really a JERK! I know when i start to meet him again, i'm trap in his web of lies. He will use me for comfort, sex, u name it...

The other night he wanted to video call and he keep on requesting for it..so ok la..kasi muka sama dia la sikit. So we video call 'till almost 3am. He acts like nothing ever happen and called me bie (used to called me when we're still together). I don't know actually what he's trying to do. Is he sincere or just fooling around. He showed me the things that i gave him before and told me that he's not gonna throw it away. I'm just confuse what he's trying to do. I think he do la but then he don't wanna show it in front of other people. And i think he obeys his mum request to not be with me anymore. So i think that is why the only way for him to talk to me is through YM or meet at his apartment.

Sigh~...this is life. Life never wants me to be happy i guess. It always confuses me~